This is submitted for Image 6 and is pretty stupid.
So when working in live TV things can go wrong, we’re always told to just improvise. Do whatever is needed to get through it and get to the next segment. This is the story of one of my more unusual on-air experiences.
It was midweek, which ment it was time for me to host my segment. It was a fairly standard product demo, where I’d show off some sort of mildly magical home device that was for sale from one of our sponsors. I’d show off the product, say how great it was and maybe take a few calls from people excited to buy one. Easy-peasy.
The cameras all aim at me, and the director counts me in 3….2….1….and he points at me to let me know I’m on.
“Hello everyone, it’s that time of the week and you all know what that means. Welcome to my wonderful warehouse it’s Witchy Wednesdays with Wendy.” There was a canned applause that gave me a minute to review the teleprompter.
“I’m very excited to show you this week’s item: The Beautiful Broom!” I feigned the excitement, it was just a broom that was imbued with an animated object spell. “This one is so simple to use and will help you clean your home, keep, dungeon or lair.”
“All you need is a basic magic wand or focus of your choice, and use the activation phase.” I made a big flourish with my wand, it’s not needed, but showmanship sells. I say the words, but I know immediately something is wrong.
Dark acrid puff of smoke fills my area, and when it’s cleared the broom is gone; replaced with a large meaty phallus. I froze for what felt like forever, but I’ve watched the tape since, it’s only a couple of seconds. I’m a pro after all. The spell failed, it’s rare but happens. Now the real question is:
What the hell did I just summon?
My producer’s voice buzzed in my ear through the earpiece I’m wearing, ‘Get rid of the dick now!’
I try to put it under to counter, but it doesn’t budge. My touch does seem to wake it up, and it immediately starts to wiggle and writhe in my hands. I remember I’m hosting a show and need to keep things as normal as possible, “Well it appears we’re having some technical difficulties with this weeks item, but if you bare with me for a moment I’m sure we can get back on track soon.”
At the sound of my voice, the magical penis jumps off the table and tries flying in my mouth. I’m just able to keep it out, but my grip failed at it starts flying around the room.
Indiscriminately, it began poking, prodding and humping anyone in the area. One of the camera operators may have gotten the worst of it, as it slapped him squarely in the face and knocked him down.
‘Ok, we’ve been doing some quick research, and we think we know what this is.’ My producer’s voice chimes in. ‘It looks like Caeleon’s Cursed Cock of Curiosity.’
“Shit!” I swear under my breath. Caeleon is infamously one of the worst wizards to have ever lived. A real dumbass. If his name is associated with this thing, it’s bad news.
My producer continued, ‘So it seems like I can be unsummoned fairly easily, you just need to ummmm….let it finish.’
My eyes went wide, “How long is that gonna take?” I realized I probably shouldn’t be having a conversation with the control room, but things are so chaotic I didn’t care anymore.
‘Yeah about that, we’ve got some ladies from the Chantry on in a few minutes, so the sooner the better. We don’t want this thing harassing some nuns.’ I didn’t think there was any way they could mean what I thought they meant. ‘Oh, it likes tits.’
Now it’s important to let you know, we don’t have the same rules for TV that you might be used to. There’s no standards and practices to sensor what’s on our show, but the idea of showing my breasts and jerking off a magic cock gave me pause.
But the show must go on.
So I undid my top and whipped the girls out. I’m happy to say I have a very ample bosom, and Caeleon’s dumb cock thing must have agreed. It immediately flew between my boobs and started thrusting so hard I was tossed around like a ragdoll.
This wasn’t going to work, I needed more control. Pleasuring this thing is one thing, but I refuse to be humped like a wild dog on realm-wide television. So I call upon my magical knowledge and create a small portal on the top of the counter. Using all my strength I managed to place the base of dick in the portal and take a deep breath.
Not large enough to actually send the thing anywhere, but it should hold it in place while I do what needed doing. I opened one of the vials next to me, it’s just hand cream, but used as set dressing to look like some magic potion. It should make for good lube.
“Well, today it seems like we’re going to show you how to deal with something like this, should it happen to you.” It wasn’t something that could possibly happen to anyone else. The odds of this ever happening again were astronomical, but I was doing everything I could to save the segment.
I began to stroke and twist the thick shaft with vigor. In between pumps I used my chest to titty fuck the meaty member. It stopped fighting me and started settling in. It really seemed to be enjoying itself. I swear I could hear it purring softly between my tits.
‘We’re going to try talking a call or two, otherwise it’s just you giving a hand job. Maybe you could try giving advice on magical mishaps or something…’
My head snapped towards my producer. I knew this wasn’t going to end well, what were they thinking?
“Ok caller, how can we help you today?”
A deep raspy voice, probably an orc, answered “Yeah baby, you stroke that thing real good! I’d like you to tug my-“ The line was mercifully cut off.
“Ok, thank you for the feedback and thanks for watching.” I stare down the control room, if my eyes could shoot daggers they would be.
I was getting a little winded at this point, but a trickle of precum dripping down the tip made me think I was getting close to the end. By now the giant dick was quite literally cooing as I stroked it, and really it seemed to be enjoying my tits.
‘Ok we’re trying one more call, I’ve been assured this isn’t some pervy guy stroking it.’
I roll my eyes, but I don’t have a better idea, “Hi there you’re on with Wendy!”
An older lady, probably a fairy or similar fae creature, with a high voice answered “I’ll take three!”
“What! No!?! I’m sorry this isn’t something for sale. This is just spell gone wrong.” I tried to suppress a laugh, but failed.
“Oh well, do you know where can I get some of those?”
“I’m honestly not sure, wait did you say you wanted three?”
“Well me and some of the ladies from knitting club were talking recently, and I think this is exactly what we need.” The sweet lady seemed disappointed I couldn’t help.
“Well I’m sorry, good luck finding what you’re looking for.” The cock was really starting to throb now. A bit of cum started pouring out of it, and then….
To call it an eruption would be an understatement.
We have fairly high ceilings on the sound stage, the height was no match for the forceful explosion in my hand. Ropes of cum shot out everywhere, covering not just me, but the entire crew was in the splash zone. I almost felt bad for them, but they hadn’t been much help over the last few minutes, so it was hard to sympathize.
A solid thirty seconds went by before the pulses subsided. The tip of Caeleon’s Cursed Cock of Curiosity reached up and kissed my cheek, leaving a cummy streak behind. Then in a puff of smoke, vanished just as it had appeared.
Exhausted, absolutely covered in magic dick cum, I looked at the camera one last time that day, “Well, Sandy’s up next with a look at the upcoming forecast. Find out if you’re going to need an umbrella, shorts or a protection spell this weekend.”
submitted by /u/altb3
[link] [comments]
Leave a Reply